Comments:

Bozoette Mary - 2006-11-05 11:20:21
The insensitivity of people never ceases to amaze me. I can only shake my head and sigh, and once agan let you know that I'm here. We all are.
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Jim - 2006-11-05 12:18:30
Ditto to what Mary said.
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bb - 2006-11-05 12:24:39
So many don't know what to say. Being human the wrong thing will fall out of their mouth. As for the dog groomer, I didn't hear his tone of voice. Was he sarcastic or was he asking if there was something he could do?
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Stefani - 2006-11-05 12:33:32
Yep, we're still here - checking up on you. Glad to know this cyber support is helping.
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Pam L - 2006-11-05 12:36:39
Unfortunately, there are some people who are so small and ignorant that they can't think past their own lives, like the dog groomer. These people must simply be ignored and discarded. No one needs that. I am glad you can write to find some solace here. Everyone needs that. Keep writing.
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Betty Lou - 2006-11-05 13:43:26
Oh, Stephanie, I am so sorry about your brother. I didn't know. I have not been getting notifies of your journal, so I thought you had stopped writing for a while. I'm sorry that there seems to be no group grief counseling for you in your area, but I'm glad that you have the support of your on-line friends.
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Stephanie - 2006-11-05 13:49:07
The dog groomer was most definitely NOT asking if there was something he could do. As I said, he SNARLED the words, and was being very mean and nasty. I'm glad the people here know the right thing to say. The sensitivity and compassion I have been shown from the online community are deeply appreciated.
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mz. em - 2006-11-05 17:38:09
You hang in there Stephanie. It is good that you have this journal to write out your feelings and a loving on-line family to listen to you.
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Sunshyn - 2006-11-05 19:14:53
See, I'm still hoping he has amnesia and will turn up somewhere. I know that's foolish and probably futile, but I just can't let go of the idea. And I didn't even KNOW your brother, or even know you HAD a brother til he went missing. I'm SO sorry. You need to learn to vocalize. Me, I just scream. It wasn't always so. But this year I've gotten VERY good at it. I may do some more shortly, if my husband ever gets back from that... thing he insisted on going to. But those are MY problems. Yours are much harder to bear. I will see my husband and my Roo again. And you don't know what or when, and you have absolutely no power over the situation at all. I HATE powerlessness. Hate hate hate it.
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Denver doug - 2006-11-05 23:25:22
Sometimes the best thing to do is sit silently beside a person and just be there for them. Here you have a bonus -- we sit here and mouth off, but in such a nice way. Hoping and praying you soon have good news.
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debbie - 2006-11-06 08:18:20
too bad you encounter your share of insensitive oafs. i cant believe that a hospice would be so insensitive but then again i guess i can. too bad there is still no sign of closure for you & your family. perhaps someday. keep us informed.
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Bex - 2006-11-06 09:53:38
I join with everyone here in saying that we are all behind you 110%, Steph, and I just wish there was more I could do for you. We all have our own little lives and toils and troubles, but at this moment, none of them seem quite so heartwrenching as yours is. I wish you some sort of peace of mind somehow, but not sure how it will come. Hugs.
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kara - 2006-11-06 10:13:25
Ugh. There's nothing worse than being kicked when you're down. I'm afraid you may have been ill-advised by your cousin. While hospice organizations offer grief counseling, it generally is intended for the loved ones of those with terminal illness. Still, that is no excuse for the poor treatment you received. Unfortunately, I can also relate to the callousness of others. When my mother was on life support in a drug-induced coma, my boss had a hissy fit when I said I couldn't work overtime. I think he was damn lucky I came in at all! And, when my father died, a coworker had the audacity to ask me if I thought my not seeing or speaking to my father for the past six months had caused his heart attack. I'm so sorry that this is happening to you and your family, and I pray that your brother is found soon.
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Sunday - 2006-11-06 18:56:07
Grrr! You're a much nicer person than I am...I've threatened to throw insensitive people through windows while grieving. The dog groomer? Tell all and sundry about his attitude and hopefully, that will lower his business enough so that he'd get the message. I like the advice that Mike gave--that'll shut 'em up--but I hate the fact that those are the first questions asked when an adult goes missing. If that's the first thing you're going to think of (I'm talking about the authorities here), then why even bother to look for them--just let friends, family, and concerned citizens look instead of the police. GAH! I dearly hope that you receive some news soon.
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